Saturday, September 8, 2007

Fridays with DaNte - 7th September 2007

Fridays with DaNte!

Well, more like Saturday EARLY EARLY morning...

Well, ok here goes Fridays with DaNte! *yawn* Guess what... this is 12:10 AM already and typing this blog feels like somnabulatory. However! Due to my faithful and indomitable commitment to my "What Would Jessica Do Blog", I refuse to indulge into the mollifying temptation of sleeping. What Would Jessica Do? She'll be savoring each moment in her dreamland now (I'm kidding!). Anyway, Lets get this over with so I can go to sleep!!!

Erratic Picture of the Day

Awww... this is so cute!

Auspicious Quotes

"Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power."

Abraham Lincoln

Word of The Day

Conflagration (noun) - A destructive fire

Yay! The Core Topic of the Day!

For now, I feel like doing something different. My innate male insticts have alerted me that I should help my fellow gender in their lives. I do hope that this blog could be lucrative for all you MAN! So, the topic for today is WHAT GUYS SHOULDN'T DO TO GIRLS!

F.Y.I.: I am not a feminist. I just want all you male with frantic hormones and urge to date girls to have a better relationship with the opposing gender.

Rule No. 1

Whatever you do, wherever you are, whoever you are, whoever you're talking to, and whatever position you're in, never NEVER NEVER EVER call a girl FAT and MEAN IT!!! For all you testosterone-producing creatures never break rule no. 1. As a male myself, I sometimes find this hilarious and amusing. However, the person whom I mock will not tolerate this and most female will take this seriously. You can see her a week after you state the debilitating word, and she will be anorexic or bullemic. I'm currently restraining myself from utilizing this killer word. I am being honest. Girls will despise you for the rest of your life for this small matter.

Rule No. 2

Never forget to call them. This simple mistake (for us testosteron-ers)is a fatal one. Their heart is a very enigmatic and unfathomable sensitive existence. It is tolerable if you infringe this rule once or twice, however it is a different problem if this occurs everyday. Girls will think you no longer care about them. Always spare 15 minutes or more everyday to call and give them a little "I love you and I missed you". It means a lot to them, even you're very preoccupied.

Rule No. 3

Never be possesive! I have seen girls who abhors possesive guys. What does possesive means? It means that when you have a feeling about them, you hamper them from doing something and feel like she is obligated to you. THIS IS A BIG MISTAKE!Some girls may like this, however that is if you are their other half, boyfriend or their crush! If you are just a friend (I do not mean to offend you) to them, you CANNOT CANNOT CANNOT NOT NOT NOT be POSSESSIVE. Girls find this very agitating and contemptuous.

Rule No. 4

Do not mention about your ex-girlfriends nor engage in any conversation about your ex-girlfriends in front of your girlfriend. Girls take this solemnly and it will worry the $#*(! out of them. After all, girls tend to be more sensitive and possessive than guys do. Girls will think you still have feelings or serruptuous relationship with your ex-couple.

Rule No. 5

Never ever show your unhygienic side to the females! In short, girls like clean and hygienic guys. Showers twice a day, brush teeth twice a day, clean their face, shave regularly, and etc. FARTING, BURPING, PICKING NOSE may not be so impressive to them. Learn this by heart.

Rule No. 6

Never hang up on your partner. I've tried this once. Only girls do this. Yes, you will assume that I am gay (I am actually). The result? An irate, furious, enraged, ferocious, enmity girl. Well I'm pretty sure you have the big picture now.

That is all to end today's Friday session with me. I'll probably continue this later on in the future. I hope this is educative and you all find this post entertaining! Let us improve ourselves and equip ourselves with gentleman-manners to prepare ourselves for our unity with our other half!

Joke of the Day!

Yo momma so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!

Well, see you all next time friends!



Nicholas Vosanovic said...

...typing this blog feels like SOMNABULATORY. --> [IT IS SOMNOLENCE YOU DIMWIT!, SOMNABULATORY IS NOT A WORD!] However! Due to my faithful and INDOMITABLE --> [DO YOU KNOW WHAT INDOMITABLE MEANS? IT MEANS IMPOSSIBLE TO FRIGHTEN] commitment to my "What Would Jessica Do Blog", I refuse to indulge into the MOLLIFYING --> [MOLIFY MEANS TO CALM. HOW CAN TEMPTATION BE CALMING?] temptation of sleeping. What Would Jessica Do? She'll be savoring each moment in her dreamland now (I'm kidding!). Anyway, Lets get this over with so I can go to sleep!!!

Considering the fact that your style is meager, your writing feels forced and suffocating to read, your words are not even contextually correct, and your grammar is like that of a child, I am quite sure that you picked these words from a thesaurus and will probably forget what they mean in a couple of hours or days.

I mean, just take a look at what you're writing. Your style is very casual and unstylish yet you use such uncasual words. It makes me feels constipated.

Maybe noone taught you that thesauruses were designed to help people come up with right, more accurate word to describe something, and not to replace a perfectly fine word with something that just doesn't fit.

It is quite obvious what you are doing.

Using your thesaurus, you are attempting to glorify yourself and cover up your insecurities about how bad a writer you are. Since NONE of these words in your first paragraph are even used correctly, it makes it look even more obvious that you are using a thesaurus and that you are doing so very ineptly.

Thus you are making a complete fool out of yourself.

Just do yourself a favor. Stop trying to be something you're not and deal with the fact that you have no talent in writing whatsoever.

Oh, and a note. This post looks like it belongs in cosmopolitan or some girl-magazine. Are you a guy or a girl saying things to try and get her guy to change?

DaNte said...

Thank you for the corroborative comment. I am sorry if my post was grammatically incorrect. But why bother reading it when it makes you constipated?

First of all, indomitable can also mean impossible to be conquered, or not giving up. I used mollifying to justify that sleeping makes you calm.

Anyways, its a blog, can't I write whatever I want to write? I was absent of ideas and since a lot of guys I know have trouble socializing w/ girls so I decided to post something useful for them.

Well, thanks for your comment anyway. I am feeling magnanimous so yeah. I will try to improve my grammar.

FYI, I did not use the thesaurus for this blog. I memorized most of these words for weeks already ;)


Nicholas Vosanovic said...


While I think it is impressive how you are so good at memorizing things, having a good memory does not in any way make you a good writer.

Indomitable means brave, determined, and impossible to defeat or frighten. This word is usually used to describe people who perseverantly fight for things. Therefore it is unsuitable to describe a commitment to write a blog.

And although you know all these words, it doesn't mean that you can pull it off.

So if you insist on practicing your english and using these words that you don't deserve to use, write in a diary or something. Don't embarrass yourself.

DaNte said...

I will improve my writing style.


InitialR said...

Senpai i will follow your rules :P ahahha

Enchanting Pixie said...

despite what nicholas vosanovic has said, i do think his writing seem to be quite engaging.

The point of such writing is to improve the skills that we have taken so lightly, when you concentrate too much on the words and the vocab somehow the words loses it's meaning. Try indulging yourself as a whole instead of the bits and pieces of such writing nicholas.

Overall, I found your writing to be quite enlightening after a long hard week. Keep improving.

Nicholas Vosanovic said...

though I may have seemed harsh in what I said, enchanting pixie, you are in a way aggreeing with me.

true isn't it that the uneccessary and incorrect use of these words distracted the reader from seeing the idea?